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In the hostel. There's a mirror in the "common room". Literally every girl, before class, walks out of her room (having already used a mirror to dress fully) to that mirror for a last glance on how well she's dressed and at how her "ass" looks in the dress.

I get it.
To women, appearance means alot; from the hair to nails, the dress and shoes, the scent and of course, the body. Women want to see and be seen as attractive and appealing.

Why do women want to seen that way?
Is it nurture?
Or society's pressure?
Or maybe they are wired that way?
I'll never know for sure but it's women we've come to accept.

But in all of this pursuit to be considered attractive,there's one that we should talk about.
Its a woman's body.

Women care so much about weight gain.
It's such a sensitive spot for any woman struggling to lose weight.
Society does recognise this and will brand a man grossly insensitive if he refers to a woman as fat. The F word is a taboo in the land of Women.

You know, where you have insecurities, doubts and a sense of sadness, there you'd find a motivational speaker. Who would say just about anything to lift your mood to enrich his pockets.
They would champion phrases as "feel comfortable in your skin"
"Fat matters"
"Boys like flesh and not bones"

And all that Crap.

Here's the truth. The whole truth and nothing but the truth.
The fact that you have to say some bunch of phrases about being fat or adding weight to up your self esteem or make you feel better about yourself is actually a problem.
And I honestly doubt that works, I even think it worsens the self esteem.
So don't listen to all that motivational speech.

The goal is to have love for yourself that transcends how good you look or how much weight you need to lose or gain.

I'll tell you a story
My story.
Growing up as a teenager,
I hated how I looked; the never ending acne.
I hated how short I was.
No matter how much i ate beans, it still wouldn't reflect on my height.
I hated my face. I had no cheeks, my face was like it was sculptured out of wood(that was the line of my pry 5 teacher). These were things I couldn't change.
My joy came from school, I was good academically, I was the best in fine art and I was playful and funny. That was how I knew women totally dig a really smart playful guy that has a thing for art. And just like that, it didn't matter that I didn't look fine or was incredibly short, school girls wanted to be around me and the boys too.

The secret is to focus on your strengths and accept your ugly. I focused on being one of the best students in my class.
I focused on drawing better.
And just like that. I didn't feel bad anymore.

My friend told me once
That everyone has a talent, trait or gift that can be harnessed to be an advantage in life.
To some, it's how good they look, cook or how intelligent they are, how arranged and organised.
To others, it's their dedication and honesty.

The more traits and talents you develop, the more you love yourself.
Everyone loves usefulness.

Seek yourself for your strengths. Focus and express it even better till love for yourself sprouts.

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