Breaking News

The Girl Hate

It started with an argument with one of my fav people,Aire.
 He was requesting why i didn't say hi whilst i was leaving the class. I replied that he was talking to someone i didn't like so why bother? He threw his hands up in exasperation and exclaimed, " what is it with women? Why don't you guys just ever get along?". At the time, this outburst was met with folded hands and a raised eyebrow. However, it had me wondering. Not just because of what he said but because it was something i had noticed since i was little. I thought it was just a like-poles-repel thing but it appears to be more than that.

  So i did some digging and it was quite amazing to discover that more people had looked into this matter particularly during the time of Hillary Clinton's campaign. A psychological reasearch is actually being carried out on it. You see how big a deal it is?

  Now to the chocolate of the matter:
   In most of the articles i looked up, this one word was staring back at me.
   One reason for girl-hate is that we see each other as threats. It finds its root in an age long behaviour that has been carried on for generations.
  Back in the days, before women had access to education, to a voice, to any right at all; all a woman had was her sex appeal. That was her passport to a man's home and probably a better life. If you were the one, wouldn't you hate anything that threatened that?

  Fast forward to present times. Women are doing awesome things. We have rights, we have education, we have way better options. Why do we still feel threatened?
  I like to think it's because that how we have been bred. Your mother tells you not to let your friends know who you're dating so she doesn't steal him from you. Your friends can't believe you let your boyfriend have that hot girl as a "friend" . We are constantly drilled and reminded to fend off the threats. It's like we're animals who have to mark our territories on our mates. It's fucking outrageous.

    Let's leave the men aside.
Women have the propensity to compare themselves with each other. Most of us fake the aura of self love, self esteem and a confidence higher than the Eiffel tower. But you set eye on another girl and the things running through your mind is; Is she prettier? Does she dress better? Is she getting more boy-ttention?

 We use this medium to measure ourselves and sometimes when we think the other girl just may be better, we decide to hate her. Call her bitch, slut, stuck-up, proud and whatever.
   Look at most of disney princesses... Cinderella, Snow White, Belle, Aurora, Pocahuntas; none of them had girlfriends. Matter of fact, any female in the picture is a threat to happy-ever-after. And what is happy ever after? Marriage to some stranger prince. Even from cradle, we are taught that women are the threats and the men are the saviours; the knights in stupid shining armours.

    One would think that with the popularity of the theory of Feminism, some of this girl-hate would be out of the way. Especially cos we're advocating for girls to be seen for way more than their sexuality. But we still live in this world where a girl fights another girl for sleeping with her boyfriend.
 Then goes ahead to forgive the boyfriend over a gift of synthetic flowers and sick-ass apologies. I actually overheard a phone conversation of an agitated wife telling a supposed side-chick to stop calling her husband; that he was a married man. I wanted to yell through my window, "your husband doesn't know he's married?"

   Let me set my righteous anger aside and just say, we're never ever gonna get anywhere if we keep fighting ourselves. We need to reconstruct that aspect of our brains that gets threatened when we see another female. This is not a fucking jungle, the males are not the ultimate prizes. Go ahead to genuinely compliment females on their fashion, their brains, their talents and not just on their engagement rings and rich boyfriends.
 Fix your confidence so much so that another female's achievements is a source of inspiration and not disdain or jealousy.
    Otrera was one powerful woman. But she didn't create the Amazons all by herself. She did it with other women and according to Greek mythology, the Amazons were the one of the most formidable forces ever. Our greatest strength lie with us together not apart.

   If you haven't, you should watch The Other Woman. It'll give you a real nice idea of what could happen if we lay down the this girl hate.


        By Sharon.


No comments